I have no idea where this fits in.

I have no idea what to do with this.

This isn’t grammar.  I’m not sure it’s usage.  Maybe it’s just a note about how people really don’t think clearly about what they say.

Yesterday, I was listening to a talk show on one of the local NPR stations.  The topic was the availability of vegan menu choices in Las Vegas.  It was actually kind of interesting.

The host was interviewing a chef, taking calls from listeners, and reading questions and comments from a website related to the show.

Here’s where it gets good.

The host read a question from the website that started out like this:

“I’m not a full-time vegan, but I lean in that direction.”

(OK.  I’m not going to address one obvious question:  “Does this guy lean in the direction of not being a full-time vegan?”)

But, I can’t help:

If you’re not a full-time vegan, are you a part-time vegan?  (I suspect that, if one is not a full-time vegan, one is simply not a vegan.  No?)

Maybe you’re a vegetarian.  Or, maybe you eat fish or eggs or meat, or have a glass of milk, once in a while.

I mean, isn’t everyone a vegan at least some of the time?  (If you have an apple for lunch, do you say you’ve had a vegan meal?  Does that make you a part-time vegan?  Maybe just until you order that down jacket online, or break down and have popcorn with butter at the movies?)  In other words, when one says, “I’m not a full-time vegan,” does that distinguish him from 99% of the people listening to the show?  How about, “I’m not a vegan, but I’d like to be.”  Or, “I’m trying really hard to get to a place where I don’t consume or use animal products.”

I’m getting tired.

Was he saying, “I’m not a full-time vegan, but I’m a vegan most of the time?”  (Is it even possible to be a vegan most of the time?)  One can just imagine this guy telling his friends, “I’m a vegan most of the time.”  (“But, sometimes, I just can’t avoid a juicy steak, or a leather belt.”)  When he goes out to eat with friends, does he make a point of avoiding the fried chicken, have a salad, and then grab a Whopper on the way home?  (Or, does he wait until the next day to have his scrambled eggs just to make his “part-time vegan” status official?)  This dude must be a real piece of work.

I give up.

While I applaud this person wanting to become a vegan, I wonder about the way he thinks.